It’s a very elusive thing. It’s very difficult to take a moment and truly be grateful for anything, I believe. And don’t tell me that you always find a way to do it on Thanksgiving or on Christmas because I’m not going to believe you. I’m not talking about the days that are engineered for you to relive past events and be nostalgic, I’m talking about genuinely taking a moment in your life, devoid of any other activity, and actually realizing that you are a capable, intelligent, healthy, loved person and and actually soaking that moment up. My cousin Randy’s friend was gunned down in Brooklyn about a month ago. Gerard. I didn’t know him, never met the guy but based on all of the messages that I have seen since this happened, I feel like I got to know him a little bit. Seemingly a nice guy. A bit cocky, but when you live in Brooklyn you gotta have that every now and then. I can’t imagine what it must have been like in the last few seconds of his life. The realization that this is all about to be over and not knowing what lies ahead. The people that you’re never going to see again. The things that you never got to tell them just one last time. And the fear. The fear in that moment and how you wish that it was just a bad dream. I hurt for Gerard because it was not fair. Whatever instigated this retaliation couldn’t have been as bad as taking his life for it, but let me get back to why I’m writing this.

I know that you see mentions about appreciating the moment in magazines. You see interviews of celebrities and they’re saying it, and I’m sure a few commercials have mentioned it too, but I’m saying it in the context of family, friends, co-workers, whatever. They know that you care but if you were to die today, would you be content with leaving it that way? I try to let my people know that I love them as much as I can, even the people that I don’t know very well but that I enjoy, I tell them too. The people I don’t know very well find me weird for doing that but I don’t mind. It’s just something that I feel and so I act on it. I don’t know how long I’ll be around. Death, paralysis, and other things are all around the corner and you can work out as much as you want but if it’s gonna happen, it’s gonna happen and them weights ain’t gonna stop it. So take a moment. It doesn’t matter where you are. Whether you’re riding on the bus, stuck in traffic, heck, even if you’re on the toilet bowl, just realize that you could be in a much worse situation than you are in and just be happy about that. Be happy that you have whoever you have around you and be happy that they are kind to you. Be glad that your cat or your dog greets you when you get home and that they make your life so much better. Be glad that you can put on your headphones and listen to great music without any real problem. Just be glad, man.

Rest in Peace Gerard Grant.

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